Wild Bird Woes

My father is coping with a small issue at his beloved bird feeder.

***

Dad: "They're eating a whole block of suet a day! Is something wrong? Are they starving?! They never used to eat that much suet!"

Me: "Dad. I'm pretty sure it's just the demographic shift."

Dad: "What do you mean?" 

Me: "Last year, what was the kind of bird you most commonly got?" 

Dad: "Mostly my little chickadee buddies." 

Me: "And what's out there now?"

Dad: "Three whiskey jacks, two magpies, a downy and a hairy woodpecker, and a flock of jays."

Me: "Dad. Every single one of those birds are meat eaters. They crave fleeeesh."

Dad: "... Ohh."

***

So yeah all the insectivores and meat inclined omnivores are eating dad out of house and home. He's having to cut them off at two blocks of suet a week for budget purposes.

They are exceedingly cranky about it. Some of them turn to the seeds instead, with greater or lesser success. I feel guilty for laughing, but woodpeckers were never made to eat seeds off a flat surface. Watching one "cling" sideways and try to hammer up some seeds as they keep sticking away from its beak. They look so exasperated. THIS TREE IS SIDEWAYS AND THIS FOOD IS MOVING. HORIZONTAL SURFACES ARE STUPID.

We'll see how long Dad holds out. He's a sucker for avian guilt trips.